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Sum140

is actually courtney elizabeth
28 Watchers13 Deviations
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California

1 min read
I'm currently in San Diego
It's gorgeous here, but I'm really starting to miss my friends.
ahsdjksah and I have to get stuffz done for my senior art class... which I'm slowly working on but I have a long way to go :/
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I'm le bored

2 min read
I'm bored. Life is a lot better since it rained. I love the rain. Who ever said "Sunshine is beautiful" has never lived in Florida, or sang in the rain. I didn't go to school on Friday :(, I was sick...*cough,cough*. And I bought some hair color "funky cherry" and a digi-pet today...yesss. Idk, about the color yet but the pet got really lame really fast...it's a goldfish. Hmmm, I'm just taking in Saturday, doing absolutely nothing, that's what I do best !
Last Cigarette: never
Last Alcoholic Drink: again never
Last Car Ride: a white truck, to Emily's from X-Fest
Last Kiss: a year ago
Last Good Cry: Last Saturday
Last Library Book: Waiting for June
Last book bought: Love and Death( The Story of who Killed Kurt Cobain)
Last Book Read: John Grisham, The Last Juror
Last Movie Seen in Theatres: wow, I think The Pacifier :stab:
Last Movie Rented: Spanglish
Last Cuss Word Uttered: fuck
Last Beverage Drank: Sprite
Last Food Consumed: a fish fillet
Last Crush: ...:blush:
Last Phone Call: stepmom
Last TV Show Watched: Meet the Barkers (yes, down with MTV but I love blink-182, and Travis Barker)
Last Time Showered: yesterday
Last Shoes Worn: black converse
Last Song: Stupid Girl- Cold
Last Item Bought: (2) hair color, and a digi-pet
Last Download: Prison Sex-Tool
Last Annoyance: stupid fat preppy chick in front of me at X-Fest
Last Disappointment: "tee shirts are thirty dollars" :(
Last Soda Drank: Sprite
Last Thing Written: "I think Mike is the best"
Last Key Used: enter
Last Words Spoken: "I won't actually post this"
Last Sleep: umm...last night 1 AM-9 AM
Last Ice Cream Eaten: coffee
Last Chair Sat In: McDonald's swivel chair
Last Webpage Visited: Live Journal
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Incesticide

3 min read
"Up up up and down
Turn turn turnaround
Round round roundabout
And over again
Gun gun son of a gun
You are the only one
That makes any difference
What I say
The sun shines in the bedroom
When we play
The raining always starts
When you go away"-Nirvana, Son of a Gun
   
   This past week really sucked. All the small thigns just built up into this massive pile of shit I had to deal with:(  After talking it out with a few people (Emily, Mike, and Austin) I started getting a little better...that was until Saturday. So I wake up not really caring too much about all the crap, and actually pretty damn happy. Then my dad decides to scream at me about every fucking thing he can "You never do anything around the house, everyone works except for you" yet I babysit every Saturday, and clean at least once a night...but I "do nothing". Followed by "you're never home" even though I WAS home all last weeked, all throughout last week and the week before...wtf ! Then he's all "why are you always in such a terrible mood, you look so miserable all the time" (so I WAS being screamed at for having a bad week...that's definetly helping the situation.) My reply " I just had a bad week, I'm not usually like this" which was me tryign to contain myself, and not explode. He's such an ass "Well that's not normal no one has a bad week, you need to fix it". "Well it's not like I can snap my fingers and be happy dad. Don't you think if I could choose how to be I'd choose to be happy ?"...now I'm in tears. "Well...work on it !"
So that's what I'm supposed to be doing right now, "working on it". W/e. I don't understand parents, it's a self fufilling thing for them to find something wrong with me, or think I'm a "typical teen"...they'll never understand. But it's not like I'd want them to, I'm just tired of them thinking they have a reason or problem with me...I'm not a problem child. My grades are great, most of the time my attitude is pretty damn good, and I never complain or talk back or am disrespectful. Idk, I guess this is why people can't wait to be 18. Three more years of this...yessss three more years.
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   I can't cry. I've been terrible since Monday night. W/e  was making me unnaturally happy has been drained, and now I'm just this mass of clogged emotion. I hate it. I want to scream or better yet cry, but the tears won't come, which is weird since that's my usual stress outlet... I cry almost 2-3 times a week. And now I'm stuck all chocked up in my throat and dying to release some of the pressure. Everyone thinks they understand, but they have no idea. I just hate that I have to help myself, and I don't know how... which just pisses me off more and ultimately makes me sadder. And no one understands/likes an emo girl. God, I WISH I understood. I bottle everything up until it becomes hell, and I have this breakdown. It's an unbearable cycle, but I can't stop. This is by far the worste it's ever been, I USED to be able to just cry it off. But my blue eyes stoled my tears. Not that it's entirely his fault, it's a bunch of crap. Idk, I'll have to figure it out for myself... which blows because I don't know what to do! God, FTW!
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   This weekend was probably the worst everrrrrrrrr. Friday was pretty cool, but they always seem to be pretty mellow and just generally nice. Not much happend but I did get to talk with one of my close friends for a few hours.
    On Saturday I kept putting off my homework for Sunday... bad move. Then at 8 Saturday night darkmoon3636 and I went to help out at prom... which we didn't volunteer for. It was lame, lame, lame. So I didn't get back to her house until like 12:30/ 1 o'clockish, I was dead.
    I wasted away Sunday until 12 because that's when I finally woke up. I went home so the brilliant Austin could help me out with my speech, which never happend :( Anyway, so I stayed up until like 12 trying to get a shitload of work done, which was so half-ass, but w/e. Idk, sorry for the :rage: but ugh... I was slammed on Sunday. Then I realized I was slammed with work and had a breakdown, about anythign and everything. I couldn't stop crying and then I was pissed because I always cry, so I cried harder.  
   It was by far the worst weekend ever. But hopefully, this one will be amazing, and make up :)
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Featured

California by Sum140, journal

I'm le bored by Sum140, journal

Incesticide by Sum140, journal

Blue eyes stoled my tears by Sum140, journal

'trapped inside your heart-shaped box' by Sum140, journal